QAF Are We Cuddling?
by BrokenAngelOfTime
Summary: It's just another normal day in the life of Brian and Justin... Or is it? After several rounds of sex, Justin notices the difference in Brian now that they're in a relationship. Set after Brian and Justin set the rules of their relationship. R&R and enjoy


Brian Kinney was a complex man, that was easy to see to anyone who knew him. He hated marriage, commitment and relationships. He _despised _heterosexuals and homosexuals trying to become a heterosexual. He always was saying "The only thing worse then a heterosexual then a homosexual trying to force himself into a heterosexual mold." Or, another one of his famous quotes, "There are only two types of straight in this world: ones that hate you to your face and ones that hate you behind your back." It was obvious to see that he disliked anything related to straight people or commitment.

And yet... We were in a relationship. An open one, of course, with rules and boundaries that we each had to obey to make it work, but it was a committed relationship. He told me when we decided to actually put down the rules of our relationship: "We are together because we want to be. Not because we have to be." I, of course, believed him. It made sense. I loved Brian and, in his own way, he at least cared about me. I wouldn't use the word love yet because for one, Brian didn't believe in love and... there wasn't anything special enough that he did for me or with me that I would consider it love. At least, on his end. I was okay with knowing he just cared about me for now; it was a good start, at least.

However, currently I was questioning his feelings about me as my head rested on his chest, listening to the steady _'thump, thump, thump' _of his heart.

I'm getting ahead of myself, through. Let me start from the beginning of our night. It started out just like any other night that we shared together. Staying in for dinner, which, for once, I actually cooked. It was a spice tomato sauce over angel hair pasta and, of course, a salad for Mr. Healthy.

Our dinner conversation was light and a little dry, but towards the end it did get a bit... _spicier._ Brian started talking about the client he had fucked in the bathroom, and, truth be told, it kind of turned me on. Enough to make me become slightly jealous, but I didn't show it, hiding it within a bit of hot humor. "Maybe when we get back I can show you why I'm the only one that is allowed to sleep in your bed anymore," I growled out playfully as we cleaned up dinner, causing Brian to quirk his eyebrow at me and give me his classic smiling smirk... the little smirk that told me that he noticed my jealousy. I avoided his gaze after that while we finished cleaning, my cheeks lightly flushed. I didn't like him knowing that I was jealous, that he had that much control over me, that I was that in love with him. It made me feel weak, and I didn't like that. Even around Brian.

It was around 9 when we left for Babylon, deciding to make it an early evening so we could leave a little earlier and have plenty of time to fuck around when they got home, even if they were to share a round in the backroom, with each other or another pair of men.

The night was very normal. Dancing, drinking, drugs, fucking, arguing with Micheal over something silly, and watching Emmett bounce from this guy to the next. Ted was even there, though he was slightly annoying about his appearance. I didn't pay too much attention to him, enjoying my time with Brian and giving another man a hot fuck. He wasn't nearly as hot as Brian, of course, but it was an enjoyable experience.

It was around 12:30am when Brian's arm wrapped around my waist, tugging me into his chest. I leaned my head back onto his shoulder, smiling just at his touch. God. I was either turning into a lesbian or worse... a fag with feelings. Smirking to myself, I listened to him whisper in my ear. "Mhm. Let's go. I want to ravish you in my bed all night long." I shivered slightly as his hot breath ghosted against my skin, becoming putty in his hands. God, I must love this man far too much.

Following him out to the Jeep, I sat quietly, but I wasn't still. My leg was bouncing as the short ride happened. As we pulled into the parking spot, his hand landed on my thigh, and he sent me a glare. I stopped, grinning softly in apology.

His mouth was against mine as he pushed me into elevator, and I eagerly kissed him back, hands winding around his neck, playing with the hairs back there. The kiss left me breathless, but he took care of all of the thinking, as usual, tugging me by the waist to the loft door. One of his strong hands left my body to open the door with the key he had fished out of his pocket when I wasn't paying attention.

Once we were inside and the door was safely closed behind us, he let go of me for another moment only to take off both of our shirts. We were kissing again for a little while before I was pushed back onto the bed, and he followed after me, both of us nude at that point. It never ceased to amaze me how fast he could do that while giving me kisses that made me lose my thoughts. My small fingers danced along the muscles of his back, scooping down to his stomach, feeling, touching, squeezing, _remembering._ I didn't want to forgot a single moment with Brian after I was bashed. I wanted to commit each tough, kiss and fuck to my memory. I wanted to savor each second with the man I loved because the next day was never a promise.

It wasn't much longer before he was using his teeth to rip open a condom, a tube of lube in his hand. The familiar warm feeling of arousal swirled in my stomach, and it wasn't long before the mind-blowing of being fucked by Brian Kinney was the only thing I could feel, taste, hear or see.

There were four rounds of sex that night before we both wordlessly decided it was enough to calm our raging hormones. At least for the night. Something was different about this, though. Normally, Brian would just roll over without a word and go to sleep after our sex but... this time, he had gently tugged the sheets around our sweaty bodies before winding his arms around my waist, holding me in a firm embrace against his chest. He kissed my hair, one of his hands lightly rubbing soothing circles into my lower back. I gladly snuggled up to him, laying my head on his chest, the steady '_thump, thump, thump_' of his heartbeat becoming a calming melody to my ears, mulling me into a half-awake-half-asleep state. In this sleepy, relaxed state, I started to think. What was Brian doing? I wasn't complaining, or anything. I _like_ this. Whatever it was. Was it... cuddling? Snuggling? I would never say that word out loud in front of Brian; he would have recoiled and pushed me out of the bed for sure. I would keep it to myself, even if I was _cuddling_ with Brian Kinney.

I felt another kiss placed on my forehead, and I sighed lightly against his skin in _bliss._ That's when I first realized it: Brian loved me. Brian honestly, truly loved him. If Brian Kinney _cuddling_ with me wasn't enough, then hell if I knew what love meant anymore.

I smiled, snuggling a little closer to the man that loved me, laying my hand on his side and kissing his chest. I've loved the brunette for a while now, but knowing that he loved me back was something I could only dream about. For once, I knew it wasn't a dream. And with that, my voice box whispered out a faint, "Love you..." before my eyes closed and my mind fell to the blanket of sleep. I swear I could see his smile though, even if it was just in my dreams.


End file.
